To the guy out there who thinks he’s a dad because he helped create a beautiful life and that’s about it, get a clue.
Just because I put on a nice face and talk to you respectfully doesn’t mean I am not hating you inside for the worthless man and “father” that you are.
The call you make every couple months to ask “how’s he doing?” or the occasional excuse of why you don’t help financially support your child doesn’t really make the cut on the parent definition.
My favorite is when you get some itch to try and be father of the year and call every other day for a couple weeks tops before you vanish completely down your hole for another few months.
Don’t think the toy you sent on Christmas makes up for the one you didn’t send on his birthday. Or the fact that you haven’t seen him in 3 years, more than half his life, will ever be acceptable in his or my eyes.
You will never be anything more than a sperm donor because your child does not know you and you don’t know him.
You don’t know his favorite color, song, TV show, his best friend, or his teacher’s name. You don’t know what scares him or what comforts him most when he is sick.
And even though I feel sad for my child that he was dealt the hand of you as his father, I pity you more.
You have missed every priceless moment. Every smile, every meltdown, the first bike ride, and first crush.
You will always be a shell of a man trying to fill a void that you never will be able to, and it is exactly what you deserve.
And to the moms out there doing it alone. You have no idea how strong you are.
Don’t ever let your child’s other parent make you feel less than you are because you are doing what God meant for two people to do, all alone.
When your baby is sad because he only has one parent and doesn’t understand, you hug them extra tight and let them know you love them enough for both parents.
And when they question why they are different than everybody else, you let them know how special they are and how you two make up two perfect parts of one whole.
And when you feel your heart is literally breaking at the pain you see in your child’s face because he wants a dad on father’s day, keep your head up and keep pushing forward so that he will grow up to be a better man than his “father.”
Don’t ever let your child or yourself feel less of a person or family because of the sperm donor who thinks he is a father.
And lastly, to the guy out there with big shoes to fill.
You will be so lucky when you find her and get to step into the spot that another man was too selfish to fill.
Take great pride in that woman allowing you into her and her child’s life. There must be something special about you to have been given that privelege.
And make sure you love that kid with all you have because he/she will love you like you have never known before.
And to the sperm donor who thinks he’s a father, good luck in life because yours will never be as good as mine.