To The Girl Whose Mom Just Died

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It’s been ten days since my mom died. I have lived for ten entire days without her. I am sure the feeling of grief will change over time— but here are ten things that have happened within the first ten days of losing her.

1Grief comes in unexpected, different-sized waves.

Sometimes the grief is huge, like a tidal wave that completely knocks me over. Usually, I save these moments for when I’m completely alone, and I can let my body properly convulse while struggling to catch my breath. Other times, the grief is only a small tide washing up on the beach, barely touching the ends of my toes. It nibbles at me and begs me to give in, but usually, I can resist. The surfer-sized waves, you know, that are just big enough to catch a wave, hit me randomly, and usually pass with just a few tears.

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